Are we losing our sense of shared humanity?

“No one is born hating another person because of the colour of his skin, or his background, or his religion.

People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.”

Nelson Mandela

Having worked for a decade as a humanitarian in some of the most challenging armed conflicts worldwide, I am deeply concerned by the events of the recent months and years.

We live, without any doubt, in the most fragile time since WWII. With more than 100M displaced persons around the world, authoritarian regimes and politicians gaining strength and ‘freedom’ under threat, we are risking losing some of the most significant societal achievements.

The need for simplified answers drives us away from authentic dialogue and the opportunity to find pragmatic solutions — these differences in opinion and action tear families, friends, political systems and societies apart. In this simplified reality, we too easily divide into good, evil, and black-and-white scenarios. The result is often a ‘scapegoat mentality’ with the risk of turning into racism or other forms of discrimination. The grey areas in between are often ignored. That is where the complexity begins but also where the true answers lie.

Once violence escalates and anger gets into the driving seat, I have observed the following two tendencies (in every conflict I worked):

• The missing acknowledgement of suffering
• Dehumanisation of the opposing side(s)

Acknowledge Suffering

First and foremost, acknowledging suffering is elementary to our existence as compassionate beings. It reminds us that, regardless of the circumstances, every individual, every community, and every nation experiences pain and suffering. When we recognise the suffering of others, we extend a hand of empathy and solidarity. This acknowledgement does not condone or justify conflict but rather acknowledges the shared human experience of pain.

Suffering is always complex, and we shall never banalise it.

Acknowledging suffering is not a sign of weakness but a display of strength and compassion. It opens the door to understanding and healing, offering an opportunity for reconciliation and peace.

In the face of conflict, we must remember that behind every face lies a story, a history, and a life filled with hopes and dreams. Recognising suffering helps us find common ground, bridging gaps that have separated us. All too often, in this highly mediatised world, it is impossible to grasp the human dimension of suffering behind simple numbers. If you think about it, in conflict, we talk about the number of dead but rarely of those injured or otherwise indirectly affected.

Dehumanisation

It is crucial to resist the dehumanisation of people in times of conflict. Dehumanisation, the process of viewing others as less than human, is a dangerous path that has been responsible for some of the darkest chapters in history.

When people are dehumanised, it becomes easier to justify violence, discrimination, and cruelty towards them. It perpetuates cycles of hatred and division.

To resist dehumanisation, we must never forget that we are all part of the same human family, no matter our differences. We have the same inherent rights and deserve the same basic respect and dignity. Dehumanisation not only harms the perceived “other” but also erodes our humanity. Recognising humanity in others, even amid conflict, fosters an environment where understanding and peace can prevail.

We are all humans

In conclusion, acknowledging suffering and resisting dehumanisation are not just moral imperatives; they are essential for maintaining our humanity and providing dignity and respect to all sides of any conflict, whether in our vicinity or on a geopolitical scale.

Doing so paves the way for dialogue, understanding, and ultimately reconciliation. Many positive examples highlighted the importance of these elements — he reconciliation after the Rwanda Genocide or the disarmament of the AUC in Colombia.

But for all this to happen, it requires openness and leadership, whether personally or politically.

Differences and divisions will permanently be part of our world. However, we can work towards a more compassionate, just, and peaceful future for all by humanising our opponents and acknowledging suffering on all sides. If you think about it, saying sorry to someone you have hurt can be one of the most liberating and healing experiences.

As a human and humanitarian, I truly care about people and not religion, race or gender. I learned that at the end of the day, it comes down to one crucial skill: Being able to put yourself into the shoes of others.